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Greenpeace terroristes : tempête dans un verre d’eau lourde

Didier Kala, mardi 6 décembre 2011 - 12:20 Partager sur Facebook Tweeter Enregistrer sur del.icio.us Enregistrer sur Google Bookmarks Enregistrer sur Yahoo! Envoyer par e-mail

Une micro-polémique a micro-éclaté hier sur le réseau de micro-blogging Twitter entre un représentant des Jeunes Populaires et la police de la pensée unique. Maxime B., porte-parole du mouvement de la jeunesse de l’UMP pour le Loiret, a présenté des excuses, mais la curée s’est poursuivie.

Pour ceux de nos lecteurs à qui cela aurait échappé, Twitter est cette immense cour de récréation numérique dont la principale caractéristique est l’égalitarisme entre individus dotés d’un ordinateur, d’un smartphone ou d’une tablette et d’un forfait data conséquent.
Le ministre y côtoie la star du showbiz et le citoyen lambda, et le dialogue libre qui en résulte fournit une matière première inestimable aux journalistes que l’actualité des grands emmerde.
Parce que Twitter est sur internet, la médaille a toutefois son revers. Cet égalitarisme a permis l’apparition d’une nouvelle génération de petits caïds brutaux, incontrôlables et acculturés, qui à la différence de leurs aînés mieux connus du grand public ignorent tout du rôle apaisant que peuvent tenir des mécènes comme Dassault, Lagardère ou France Télévisions.

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Maxime B. (centre) a pu débattre tranquillement avec la gauchosphère.

Le spectacle auquel nous avons assisté hier est symptomatique de ce triste état de fait.
Maxime B., porte-parole des Jeunes Populaires pour le Loiret [1], tout à la fougue de ses 19 ans, a écrit ceci suite à l’intrusion de militants de Greenpeace dans des installations nucléaires :
«  La gendarmerie aurait dû abattre les terroristes de #greenpeace ! Ils ne méritent pas de traitements particuliers…  »

Remarque badine sur l’actualité, qui diffère uniquement des standards de Twitter par sa grammaire irréprochable.
Or Maxime B. a commis deux erreurs : il est jeune et de droite.
Le jeune de droite, s’il est un tant soit peu cohérent avec ses idées, milite. Malheureusement, son mouvement de prédilection est précisément la cible de l’opprobre des Nouveaux Caïds, à tel point que la présence d’un Jeune Pop sur Twitter ressemble plus à une pratique sadomasochiste qui confine à la pédophilie qu’à l’expression d’une opinion politique dans un cadre pluraliste.

Maxime B. a promptement effacé son message et s’est excusé en termes contrits, mais cela n’a pas empêché les événements de suivre leur cours, désormais bien connu : avalanche de réactions moqueuses sur Twitter et Facebook, débordement dans le monde réel avec un article de Libération [2], puis suspension de ses fonctions par l’UMP.

Trois leçons émergent de ce fait divers en 114 caractères.
Première leçon : la gauchosphère et Libération, si prompts à s’indigner du sort de l’opprimé, ont proprement lynché un gamin de 19 ans dont le profil Facebook cite comme films préférés Transformers et Harry Potter. Chantres quotidiens de l’anonymat et de la permissivité, ils ont par ailleurs offert à Maxime B. un beau défi pour faire valoir le droit à l’oubli dans les années qui viennent.
Seconde leçon, positive cette fois : la large reprise de cette affaire sur les sites des quotidiens généralistes — une petite vingtaine d’articles relevés ce matin sur Google Actualités — démontre bien qu’il y a aujourd’hui peu de sujets qui méritent qu’un journaliste perde du temps à mener une enquête approfondie. C’est une bonne nouvelle et cela rassurera les Français.
Nous prions toutefois les rédactions de noter que les lecteurs des articles traitant de Twitter sont des usagers de Twitter, et qu’ils savent déjà. Merci.

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Des agents de la DGSE déploient une banderole sur un bâtiment de Greenpeace.

La troisième leçon touche au fond du problème.
L’intrusion d’étrangers sur un site sensible est potentiellement dangereuse pour la sûreté nationale. En suggérant que la gendarmerie aurait dû abattre les militants de Greenpeace - que la barbe touffue rend indiscernables des terroristes islamistes tant qu’ils ne poussent pas des petits cris de panda - Maxime B. ne fait qu’exprimer un souci de sécurité des installations nucléaires. Tout comme les écologistes et les socialistes.
Socialistes qui ne devraient pas oublier l’année 1985, quand François Mitterrand avait explicitement autorisé les services français à abattre les terroristes de Greenpeace à Auckland, en Nouvelle-Zélande, au nom de la sûreté de notre filière nucléaire.
Cette compréhension alternative des conventions du système métrique, connue sous le nom de « deux poids, deux mesures », nous aura au moins appris que certaines tempêtes se déroulent dans des verres d’eau lourde.

Notes

[1Le trou dans la France au sud de Paris.

[2L’appartenance de Libération au monde réel plutôt qu’au monde virtuel fait débat parmi les spécialistes, mais certains sociologues assurent que parfois un exemplaire papier est aperçu en liberté. Même si nous n’avons pas directement constaté les faits, nous choisissons par prudence de respecter l’hypothèse haute.

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Réactions à Greenpeace terroristes : tempête dans un verre d’eau lourde

Les vrais Patriotes pratiquent la réaction dans la joie et la bonne humeur depuis 2002. Réagissez aussi !

Déjà 25 réactions.

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  • {#EMAIL_AUTEUR,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

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    Greenpeace terroristes : temp

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    • {#EMAIL_AUTEUR,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

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      Greenpeace terroristes : temp

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Déjà 20 réactions.

  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    9 janvier 2012 15:48, par Sébastion

    En effet ... Google

    En effet ... Google
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    28 décembre 2011 19:46, par BraveAbonné, le retour

    Ah bon c’est un plagiat...ça…

    Ah bon c'est un plagiat...ça me rassure finalement, j'étais en train de penser: "Quand même, c'est tout de même pas M. Koala qu'a écrit un truc aussi long et compliqué"
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    18 décembre 2011 08:23, par Claude Ratinier

    Le nucléaire, j’aime bien,…

    Le nucléaire, j'aime bien, ca fait de jolis champignons. Mais une inquiétude demeure avant de laisser éclater mon enthousiasme quant à l'atome : l'anisette est elle soluble dans l'eau lourde ??
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    10 décembre 2011 22:56, par

    Vu un film de Gérard Depardieu…

    Vu un film de Gérard Depardieu et Andy Mac Dowell sur la carte Green Peace, mais je ne suis plus sûr de mes sources. Peut-être qu'ils ont quand même des papiers ?
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 16:07, par Jacques Huze

    et alors ?

    et alors ?
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 15:22, par Maikouye Sonplaine

    "Didier Kalat pris en flagrant…

    "Didier Kalat pris en flagrant délit de plagiat" ! Quelle assertion falote ! Quelle pantalonnade ! Le bœuf qui pleure, nous, Bravepatriotes valeureux vous enjoignons de tomber le masque sordide de l'islamo-gauchisme. Didier K. ne plagie pas, il inspire. Didier K. ne suit pas, il guide. Nous (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 10:48, par Didier Kala

    Cher Professeur, je vous…

    Cher Professeur, je vous prie d'accepter mes excuses les plus plates. Ça a l'air sympa, Fafbook, faudrait que j'aille y voir plus souvent. Bien à vous, Didier Kala
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 10:42, par Didier Kala

    Flûte, c’est la dernière…

    Flûte, c'est la dernière phrase qui vous chagrine ? (Sinon, ne pas confondre pompeux et torché, même si la convergence est possible.)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 09:56, par Le Bœuf Qui Pleure

    M. Kala, vous êtes pris…

    M. Kala, vous êtes pris en flagant délit de plagiat : vous avez pompé ( cf. « exercice de style pompeux », toute honte bue, cet article de FafBook : http://tinyurl.com/85xw4m9 On sent, certes, que vous hésitâtes à titrer « Tempête dans un verre de Greenpeace »… Ce pourquoi vous serez cependant (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 09:38, par Mourad Guichard

    Là, Didier Kala, vous n’êtes…

    Là, Didier Kala, vous n'êtes plus du tout dans la discussion, mais dans l'exercice de style pompeux, voire ennuyeux. C'est dommage. À bientôt sur un autre sujet. PS: comme précisé sur Twitter, je m'exprime ici en mon nom, pas au nom d'un quelconque (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 08:25, par Maikouye Sonplaine

    Écoutez les amis, au lieu…

    Écoutez les amis, au lieu de vous engager dans un concours de saut en largeur, discipline complètement dominée par François Hollande et ses amis éléphants, je vous recommande de boire le(s) verre(s) de l amitié. J'ai découvert le week-end dernier le bourguignon Nicolas Rossignol qui nous fait du Volnay (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 04:10, par Didier Kala

    Autre papier avec nouvel…

    Autre papier avec nouvel angle, s'il vous plait, nous aimerions beaucoup lire ce que vous saurez apporter à l'éclairage du sujet, et vous semblez y être sensible. Le propos de Christophe Rossignol : j'avais un peu relu le premier message avant de vous répondre, et avais viré le "message lui-même (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 03:01, par Mourad Guichard

    "... se font l’écho de broutille…

    "... se font l'écho de broutilles de cour de récré sans aller au fond des choses" Je ne partage pas du tout ce point de vue. D'autant que l'info a aussi fait l'objet d'une dépêche Reuters. Pourquoi? Sans doute parce qu'elle permet de mettre en lumière les pratiques sur les réseaux sociaux et les (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    7 décembre 2011 00:29, par

    bravo ! clap clap clap !! …

    bravo! clap clap clap!! yen a marre de cette ompréhension alternative des conventions du système métrique! non mais ho...
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    6 décembre 2011 22:32, par Jacques Huze

    Je résume si j’ai bien compris…

    Je résume si j'ai bien compris : Maxime B. défend des positions de gauche tout en étant à droite (le souci de sécurité des installations nucléaires) et provoque des tempêtes dans des verres d'eau à Lourdes... les JUMP c'est plus ce que c'était....un leapdeub, vite (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    6 décembre 2011 18:11, par John-Luc Demay-Lanchon

    La droite ne fait que copier…

    La droite ne fait que copier la gauche. On avait tout inventé, votez Front de Gauche
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    6 décembre 2011 18:01, par Cron Tab

    Greenpeace, avec un nom pareil,…

    Greenpeace, avec un nom pareil, je suis sûr qu'ils ont pas leurs papiers. Bref, on les aurait renvoyé dans leur beatnickistan natal dès le début on en serait pas arrivés là
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    6 décembre 2011 16:37, par MHPA

    Hé oui, et comme toujours…

    Hé oui, et comme toujours nous sommes ces gardiens de l'avenir des Français que piétinent une horde de passéistes...
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    6 décembre 2011 15:52, par Didier Kala

    Le manque de formation du…

    Le manque de formation du cadre en question est un faux problème : qu'un Jeune Pop dise une connerie est dans l'ordre des choses, d'autant plus quand elle rejoint sur le fond ce que suggèrent plus subtilement ses aînés à la formation complète. Qu'il se fasse bâcher sur les réseaux pour des conneries (...)
  • {#EMAIL,32,#URL_SITE_SPIP/petit_coq.gif}

    6 décembre 2011 14:37, par Mourad Guichard

    Affirmer que Libération…

    Affirmer que Libération a participé à un lynchage me semble inexact. Le journal n'a fait que relater une information qui a tout de même conduit GreenPeace et le Pdt des Jeunes Pop à s'exprimer ou prendre position. Je trouve d'ailleurs que le fond du problème (que vous n'abordez pas dans ce billet par (...)

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